Well, it looks like we are making progress with Elijah's attitude about the baby that's on the way.
When we found out I was pregnant, we told Elijah about the baby right away, but he wasn't too thrilled about the idea:
He didn't even like to talk about it, in general. When we would bring up the baby he would get upset and throw a fit. He wouldn't even tell us if he wanted a brother or a sister... whenever we would ask he would say the last thing we said "Do you want a brother or a sister?" "Sister" "Do you want a sister or a brother?" "Brudder". (I must say I do love the way he says brother, so I'm glad we're having a boy, haha.)
The next phase to go through was complete denial... Apparently instead of a baby growing inside of me, Elijah decided I was just getting fat and making excuses not to play certain things with him. Mostly they were things that involved sliding down slides and sitting on the ground.
One day we had a conversation that went a little like this:
One day we had a conversation that went a little like this:
*Elijah was rubbing my belly
Jo: There's a baby in there
Elijah: No no no no, Dop (stop) it!
Jo: Yes, there is. Isn't right in there.
Elijah: No! Dop it!!
After a while things started to get better. As my belly was getting bigger, Joe would request that Elijah give the baby a hug or a kiss and he would run over, lift up the bottom of my shirt and do whichever. It was nice to see that Elijah was at least acknowledging that something was in there. That was good enough for me. I figured we would just work out the rest after the baby was born.
However, to prepare for that event Joe and I decided we were going to get Elijah a book about what to expect after the baby is born, so he's not shocked and appalled, all the while wondering why the baby isn't leaving. So we searched high and low and at every bookstore to find the perfect book. All the books we found were entirely too detailed for a little 3-year-old mind. I mean what 3-year-old wants to know what a uterus looks like?
We happen to stumble upon the perfect book (for a sister) at a Borders that was closing, so Joe ordered the boy version from Barnes and Noble the next day:
It is a pretty awesome book. Just the right amount of information and nothing too grown up. It says how there's a new baby and it can't eat things like pizza and ice cream and it can't walk or talk. But it says how the big brother is special because he can do all those things. It also says a little bit about why babies cry... which will be helpful to prep him that there will be crying going on.
We gave him the book and, at first, he didn't want to read it. Then one day I found him in a good mood, so he let me read it to him. Then about a week later he let me read it again. That leads us to earlier this week. We hadn't read it in a few weeks, so he was like, "How 'bout that one?" pointing to the big brother book. He actually requested to read/look at it. Turns out he didn't want me to read it, but he wanted to flip through it and look at the pictures while he was eating dinner. He is a very picky and slow eater, so usually I don't let him do anything that will distract him from eating, during meal times, but this time I let him, since, after all, it was a very special request.
With three months left, I think we are making good progress with the whole thing. I'm sure it will be a big adjustment when the baby actually gets here, but for now he seems to be coping well with the idea. Afterward we plan on letting him help with the baby, if he wants to. For instance getting diapers and wipes or anything else we might need that's across the room. He also likes to "read", so I'm going to see if he would like to read to the baby. We will think of more along the way, but that's a good start.
I know he'll be a wonderful big brother. I just hope everything goes smoothly for the most part.
3 comments:
I'm happy he's starting to warm up to the idea. It'll be a tough transition, for sure. And there's bound to be backwards steps along the way, but I'm sure that'll he'll get accustomed to the new baby quickly. He is a genius after all!
That's Elijah! In his time....
He'll be a wonderful brother and I'm so glad that he's enjoying the big brother book now. By the time his new brother comes he'll have it all figured out.
Love the first photo by the way!!
Glad he's getting use to the idea!!! Fabulous ;)
maria
Post a Comment